If you’re a big fan of Marvel’s Infinity Wars, or if your life long goal is to seek balance in all things, you may have recently found yourself on the subreddit r/thanosdidnothingwrong. Being a relatively new subreddit, this page amassed over 700k subscribers shortly after announcing the promise of banning half of their subscribers.
In an event on July 7, 2018 referred to as “The Snap”, half of the subreddit’s subscribers were saved by Thanos. However, there are still the unfortunate few who remain unbanned and can post, comment and up vote freely today. If you, like myself, find yourself in this position, don’t panic. Just follow these few steps to get through this unbearably difficult time in your life.
- Cry
You deserve it. Your whole life had been leading up to this moment and you didn’t get banned. Don’t hold back. Let this be the outlet for all the other failures and mistakes you’ve made. Life is so unfair.
- Compose yourself
Alright, your moment of weakness is over. Time to show to your friends and family that you don’t really care about some dumb subreddit. Wipe those salty tears off your face and continue eating dinner. Or better yet, make use of those tears to enhance the flavor of your bland mashed potatoes. Disregard the concerned and disappointed looks from the rest of the table.
- Look on the bright side
Remember what this was all for in the first place. While you may not have been one of the lucky half who got saved by Thanos, you still got to play a major role in history. All that shit-posting wasn’t for nothing. Without your pointless desire to ban 350k people from a subreddit, The Snap may have never happened and the universe wouldn’t be perfectly balanced. As all things should be.